It's another wedding season and everyone in my world is getting engaged or about to get hitched. What about me you might ask? NADA. Am I sad,jealous, or lonely? It depends on my day's thought process. Somedays I'm happy and hopeful and then there's those other dreadful days where I hear this voice telling me, "It's never gonna happen" and the infamous one, "There are no good men left in this world." I panic for a few seconds and then God snaps me out it and tells me , "I know the desires of your heart,remember and wait patiently." PATIENTLY!!!!!???? I've been waiting for almost 25 years. -_- You see, as a young girl I made a plan that by 25 I was to be married, have a stable career, and enjoy life with the man of my dreams. How dreamy of me. So the pressure due to my plan has caused many faults into the decisions I've made with my past relationships, and I reached a point of exhaustion.
So when my last relationship failed I told God, "Okay this sucks but I failed again because I didn't listen to you instead I listened to my flesh. I'm sorry it had to come to this but thank you for snapping me out of it. Thank you for still loving me. I love you so much Lord."
After that, I know that giving it to God completely and waiting for the man that God has for me will not cause any regretful mistakes. I want to be pure and build a Godly foundation. I simply want to do it the right way. So i'll just have to trust and wait joyfully because I know I'm receiving a gift. :)
THIS IS ESSENTIAL!!!
"Trust in the LORD with all your heart; do not depend on your understanding.Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take" Proverbs 3:5-6
But my heart desires more than just being a wife. I know God's destiny for me is an adventure filled with great moments that will surely fufill my purpose in this life. I always tell God that I want more then just working at Nordstrom, becoming a wife,and doing my regular routine. And so my perspective in my life changes because I give it to him. This is a huge struggle for me because I feel incomplete if I don't have the ONE by my side. But God tells me, "He won't ever complete you, I will." I constantly have to remind myself but it's working. :)
Believing and standing firm on Faith,Love,and Hope drives me to a potential that I would have never thought I could reach.It seems like yesterday I was saying, "Ya I know God wants me to become an actress and create projects to bring a light into audiences hearts." And now I'm part of an awesome theatre ministry and working myself through this acting thing. God is amazing. If we follow him through Christ we become his children and he prizes us in the most loving manner. To him, we're all extremely special and he is the main supporter for our dreams. I'm holding on to this and believing strongly! So no matter what people and my mind tell me, I know that because I'm single I'm not a failure.
So I hope this brings a certain comfort to all the singles out there. I pray that lonliness doesn't take advantage of your heart but instead you take this time to realize your greatness, and how you can make a difference!
P.S. For your beauty sleep : "You are altogether beautiful, my darling, beautiful in every way." Song of Solomon 4:7